Painslut or not?

Singletail whip

My friend and enemy

I’ve always liked the idea of being ‘hurt’ in some way by scary (but handsome) men. Even as a child I had fantasies of being kidnapped and tortured. (Besides those fantasies I was actually a pretty normal child…) When I started to experiment with bdsm I realised that getting whipped in your fantasy doesn’t actually hurt that much, but damn… in real! Do I really like this? Well, since my previous boyfriends weren’t that dominant or sadistic after all… those experiments didn’t last long.  Fortunately (or unfortunately) for me, I met a very sadistic man about a year ago…. And nowadays I’m His.

When we started playing together, I couldn’t take that much. He hit hard, without warming up, using the meanest whips I had ever seen. (I mean, a 1,2m single tail on your first playdate…are you insane?) He was (and sometimes still is) very unpredictable, one moment he was whipping my ass and just a sec later he had smashed it hard across my back. I really doubted whether I was that masochistic…

In the first months of 2013 we didn’t play so much. Both busy and too tired for long sm plays. I think it was somewhere in May that he unboxed some of his bdsm torturetools. ( He has a lot of boxes…) From that moment he started to warm me up a bit more with less meaner whips and I could take a lot  more. I started to like it again, wanted actually more. I even wanted that single tail again… hard and without mercy, but of course I was wise enough not to ask. Well, asking wasn’t really necessary, because after a while he unboxed his torture tail again. I was pretty excited, but also scared. He started to whip me slowly and I kind of liked it. After a bit warming up he started to hit harder and I wanted more and more. Endorphines and adrenaline were running trough my veins and I felt so good afterwards and the best thing was: he was proud of me. Since then I kind of started to like that whip and I want to feel it more. I think I’m slowly turning into a painslut. (or am I already?)

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